mynamesearn

I stumbled upon a video on TikTok the other day. It was about someone who got groomed by Marilyn Manson on his tour bus when they were just 16. And honestly? It just sent me into a spiral of thoughts. Like, why is it that when a celebrity does something really bad, like grooming, raping, being abusive, or even openly racist, it’s somehow more… acceptable? Or easier for people to look away from? Why is it so normalized, even?

I’ve unfollowed so many celebrities over the years for this exact reason. It’s like every time you scroll, someone’s favorite actor or pop star is exposed for something awful and yet their follower count stays the same, or even goes up. And what gets me is that so many people still follow influencers and celebrities purely for the look, their style, their cool factor, their curated image. But behind all of that, some of these people are just really, genuinely awful.

Personally, I can’t do that. I can’t separate the “fabulous” from the fact that they’re just a shitty person. I don’t care how good your fashion is or how iconic your photos are, if your soul is ugly, I’m out. Like, if I had to get my opinions, my inspirations, or my vibes from someone who’s completely hollow inside, I’d rather just find someone else. Period.

And yeah, I get it. They don’t even know I exist. But still. once I know the truth about someone, I can’t pretend I don’t. I get turned off so fast. And I don’t like how being famous becomes this weird pass to be cruel, or dismissive, or straight-up toxic. That can’t be the reason they get away with everything. It’s not fair. And okay, life isn’t fair, but that doesn’t mean I have to just accept it.

Let’s say we lose one celebrity, someone iconic, but a horrible person in real life. What happens? Nothing. The world keeps turning. And we start to realize: there are so many people out there who are beautiful inside and out. We’re not going to miss that one person just because they were famous. If anything, clearing space makes room for people who are actually good to shine. 

And maybe I’m being too intense about this, but I really hate it when someone who has more, more money, more fame, more whatever, uses that to treat others like they’re nothing. It’s so ugly. No one wants to feel “less than.” And most people aren’t even trying to compete like that. It’s the people at the top who build these fake expectations around appearances and success and then pressure themselves to keep performing. That’s the saddest part. It’s like… you created this whole image trap and now you’re stuck in it.

It’s not even just celebrities. A friend told me about this girl in her life who treats her unfairly even though the girl has had way more advantages. And yeah, she’s stunning. But that doesn’t excuse the behaviour. Being beautiful or privileged or high up in life doesn’t make you better. It doesn’t make you right.

And honestly, I’ve heard people, even grown adults, still judging others based on who wears the most high fashion or how many followers they have. Like… are we still in high school? That mindset is exhausting. If your whole personality is based on clout or who you know, I just don’t get it.

I think social media made everything worse. Not just because it gives celebrities more power, but because it makes us feel like we know them, like we’re close, like we’re friends. We see their selfies, their stories, their morning routines, their skincare. We see them crying on their Stories and doing GRWMs like they’re just like us. But let’s be real, they’re not. Not all of them, anyway.

Social media gives people the illusion of intimacy without actual accountability. Celebrities and influencers can mess up badly, say something harmful, hurt real people, and the next day, it’s back to outfit pics and brand deals like nothing happened. And the comments? Full of “Queen,” “Slay,” and “Unbothered ” like none of it mattered. I don’t know, that just doesn’t sit right with me.

I’m not saying cancel everyone over every mistake. But there’s a difference between being human and being heartless. Between learning and just… never caring in the first place. The way we let fame, followers, and aesthetics blur that line is wild. Someone can be a terrible person, but as long as they have a pretty feed and a cute dog and know how to go viral, people will still worship them. Somewhere along the way, people started confusing influence with integrity. But they’re not the same.

And I get it, sometimes it’s fun to follow someone for style, or escapism, or just pure entertainment. But we have to stop pretending that just because someone is famous, they’re worth more than anyone else. Being famous doesn’t automatically mean you’re a good person. Having followers doesn’t mean you have values.

All of this makes me think about how much we project onto celebrities and influencers. We expect them to be amazing, inspiring, morally perfect people, but a lot of them aren’t. I don’t care how famous you are. I care if your soul is good. I see people for their energy. And if your energy isn’t kind, I’m not interested.

There are too many beautiful, creative, genuinely good people out there who deserve that love instead. People who don’t need to perform goodness, they just are.

And I think that’s one of the most beautiful things we get to do as humans: to actually see each other. To connect in small, unexpected ways. Whether it’s talking to a stranger on the street, dancing in the dark with someone you just met, or sharing a random deep convo with someone you’ll never meet again, those are the moments that matter.

So yeah. I guess my point is… just be good to people. Not for show, not for content, just in real life. Be nice to the people around you. Give love without expectation. Let people be who they are.

And if someone judges you for how you look or what you post, that’s not your problem. If someone says something nasty, that’s not your problem either. Who even are they?

At the end of the day, the real flex is a beautiful soul. That’s who I want to follow: people who move with kindness, speak with intention, and show up for others without needing the spotlight. The ones who don’t just look good, but feel good to be around. That’s the energy I’m drawn to. That’s the kind of person I want to be, too.