mynamesearn

I love yearning men. And honestly… why wouldn’t we want that anymore?

Today might be a little different because for once I’m not here to hate on men. Instead, I’m here to be slightly obsessed with one. Or at least with the idea of one.

I feel like yearning is one of the most attractive things a man can do. Worship me or whatever that shit is sexy af. I just don’t understand the concept of being nonchalant. Or maybe I understand it, but I just can’t relate to it.

Maybe I’m just not that kind of person.

I would never be nonchalant about anything, because that’s just not how I’m built. And honestly, I love that about me. I wouldn’t want to change it. I think society kind of pushes us to be more nonchalant these days.

We’re supposed to act cool about everything. Don’t text too fast. Don’t show too much interest. Don’t care too much.

But why?

I get it in a way, because of all these dating rules people created. And I think when I was younger I tried to be nonchalant too, like everybody else.

Pretending I didn’t care that much. Pretending I wasn’t that interested. But I couldn’t keep that act for long because it’s just not who I am.

Now that we’re older and understand how the world works a little more, we also understand something else: being nonchalant actually doesn’t matter.

You either care or you don’t.

And personally, I love people who yearn. I love people who are passionate about love. People who are not afraid to feel things deeply.

Not the cool, detached, mysterious type who acts like he doesn’t care about anything. That whole “I don’t need anyone” thing is honestly a little boring to me.

I like it when someone clearly wants something. When someone is excited about love. When someone is not afraid to show it.

And let me also remind everyone that as much as I say I hate men… I’m still attracted to them so badly.

Which is honestly the most annoying thing ever.

Because I hate them… but I also LOVE them down bad.

I can spend a whole day talking about how annoying men are, and then suddenly one walks into the room who is hot, intelligent, funny, passionate, and maybe just a little obsessed with love… and I’m immediately attracted to that.

And it’s always the passionate ones. The ones who talk about things they care about with that little spark in their eyes.

The ones who get excited about some random topic you’ve never even thought about before. The ones who feel things deeply instead of pretending they don’t feel anything at all.

There’s something so attractive about someone who is not afraid to want something.

And when that something happens to be love?

Yeah… that’s dangerously hot. That might be the most attractive type of man there is.

But this whole thought actually came to me while I was watching Bridgerton. And watching that show made me realize something else.

To be able to wake up late is a privilege.

Sometimes we live our lives chasing big achievements, big goals, big dreams. And in the middle of all that we forget to feel grateful for the small things in life.

Watching this show made me feel loved in a weird way, because the whole story is about love. But at the same time it also reminded me that being able to love whoever you want today is actually a privilege.

Because if I lived in that time period… I would probably be a maid. And if I fell in love with some nobleman, what would happen?

Realistically, nothing good. That kind of love wasn’t romantic back then. It was impossible.

There were strict social boundaries. A maid wasn’t supposed to be anything more than a servant. Loving someone above your class wasn’t some beautiful story like in movies.

It would probably end badly, or just never happen at all.

And suddenly I realized how strange it is that today we are all so nonchalant about love. Sometimes even ungrateful about it.

Maybe it’s because we have so many options now. And I agree, having options is a good thing.

I would never say we should go back to those times. But it also means we have something that people in the past didn’t have.

The privilege to love who we want. Not only in romantic relationships, but also in friendships.

Back then you couldn’t just be friends with anyone. If you were a maid, you couldn’t just casually be friends with a lady of the house, you know?

There were clear social boundaries. You served her, you didn’t sit around gossiping like equals.

At the end of the day there were very strict social class differences. Everyone knew their place and stepping outside of it wasn’t exactly acceptable.

But now we can love anyone. We can be friends with anyone. And when you really think about it… that is actually kind of amazing.

Of course, I know we are not living in that time anymore. But that’s exactly why it’s a privilege.

And not all love is nice and sweet, I know that too. Sometimes love hurts. Sometimes love is messy.

But that’s the point.

We get to experience love more now because we have the freedom to.

And I love love so much.

Weirdly enough, I’m not even the one in a relationship right now. But love still feels nice to me even when I’m not personally experiencing it.

I don’t even have anyone specific to dream about right now. But I still love the idea of it.

Maybe it’s because I’m feeling emotional lately. Love just feels good in the air somehow. Not because I need it or want it right now, but just because it exists.

Sometimes it’s nice to simply witness it. Seeing two people care about each other, seeing people look at each other like they actually matter. 

Even small things, like someone remembering how you like your coffee or sending you a random message just to check if you’re okay. Those tiny moments feel like proof that love is still everywhere.

And I don’t even have anyone specific to think about right now. I’m not secretly in love with someone. I’m not dreaming about some future relationship.

I just like the idea of love itself. It feels warm. It feels hopeful. It feels like something good is always possible.

Why does love have to be a scandal when two people from completely different worlds happen to love each other?

Why does it always become some dramatic story when someone chooses love over rules, status, expectations, or whatever society says they should do?

If anything, love should be the least scandalous thing in the world.

Love makes people help each other. It makes people kinder. It makes people braver.

It makes people step outside of themselves for a moment and actually care about someone else’s happiness. Sometimes love is the reason people grow, change, and become better.

And I know it sounds cheesy. I know people roll their eyes when someone says things like this. But honestly… sometimes love really can conquer everything.

Maybe not in some perfect fairytale way. But in the small ways that actually matter. The way people show up for each other. The way people stay when things get difficult. The way someone chooses you again and again.

And maybe that’s exactly why I love yearning men so much.

Because yearning means someone is not afraid to feel something deeply. Yearning means they want love and they’re not ashamed of it.

And honestly? That might be the hottest thing in the world.