mynamesearn

I have been watching Jubilee a lot lately. I just realized how much I enjoy hearing people argue. Not in a toxic way, more like, it’s a space where people actually speak their minds. But the more I watch, the more I feel like some men just don’t want to accept the fact that women can disagree with them. And honestly, sometimes watching them helps me let out the anger I didn’t even know I had. 

But something keeps coming up in those debates, and in real life too: some men get so uncomfortable when a woman steps into a leadership role. Like… why? Why is it so hard to accept that a woman can disagree with you, lead, speak up, or challenge you? Why are men so scared of women stepping into leadership roles? 

And before we go any further, yes, I know it’s not all men. I never said it was all men. This is my experience and my opinion, and I have the right to express it. So, keep that in mind and be open-minded about it.

I feel like we are all so stuck on the terms ‘feminine’ and ‘masculine.’ We think men have to be masculine only and women have to be feminine. But this isn’t about gender at all. ‘Feminine’ and ‘masculine’ are just archetypal energies, concepts from ancient philosophy, psychology, and metaphysics. These terms have so many layers to them. In astrology, there’s the Sun and Moon. In psychology and sociology, “feminine” and “masculine” are seen as social constructs, but they still play a role in archetypal psychology. They’re just traits, not rules.

Masculine traits include independence, competitiveness, aggression, logic, and leadership. Feminine traits include empathy, nurturing, receptivity, cooperation, and intuition. Everyone has both. But people get so obsessed with labels that they end up putting themselves and others into boxes that don’t even exist. Why can’t we just let people be? It’s really not that deep. And when we create these boxes for ourselves, we also start forcing people into them too, which makes us miss out on their real potential, or even our own.

Can we just see people as they are, instead of thinking, “Oh, he’s a man, so that’s just what men do”? Like, how come men can sleep around and no one cares, but when women do it, they get shamed and called sluts? Well, if that makes her a slut, then that makes you one too. People are capable of controlling themselves.

If sleeping around is your thing, that’s your choice. But if you’re in a relationship, then you should honor that commitment, unless you and your partner agree on something else. Personally, I don’t think polygamy is for me and never will be, but if it works for others, then good for them. As long as it’s mutual and honest, do whatever you want.

Back to the main point, why are some men so afraid of women stepping into leadership roles? Maybe it’s because we keep putting these invisible boxes around people and forgetting that we are all just human. We have different traits, whether you call them “feminine” and “masculine,” yin and yang, or Sun and Moon. These are just titles for traits, not definitions of who we are. A man can be sensitive. A woman can be aggressive. A man can have empathy (and honestly, everyone should). A woman can be a leader. A man can be intuitive.

But let’s go deeper, why is this fear so deeply ingrained? A lot of it comes from history. For centuries, men were the ones making decisions, ruling countries, leading wars, and controlling resources. Women were often excluded from education, politics, and business. That kind of power dynamic doesn’t just disappear overnight—it gets passed down through generations in subtle ways. Some men have been conditioned to believe that a strong woman is a threat to their own authority. They aren’t used to women challenging them, making decisions, or leading the way.

It’s also about ego. Some men tie their self-worth to the idea of being dominant, being the provider, being the one in control. When a woman steps into leadership, it forces them to rethink their place in the world. Instead of seeing it as an opportunity to grow and evolve, they see it as a challenge to their masculinity. But leadership isn’t about gender, it’s about capability. It’s about who can do the job best, who has the vision, who can inspire others. And if a woman fits that role, she should take it without hesitation.

If you’re intimidated by that, it might say more about you than it does about other people or women. Why should it make you angry? If a man were doing the same thing, would you feel the same way? It’s triggering you for a reason, and sometimes, before blaming others, we have to look within ourselves.

When we force these boxes on how men and women should behave, we add unnecessary pressure on how we’re expected to act, not just in leadership roles, but in life. Breaking free from these pressures could be the key to growth and acceptance, both of ourselves and of others.

The truth is, women in leadership make the world better. Studies show that companies with women in executive positions tend to perform better. Women leaders bring new perspectives, emotional intelligence, and a different approach to problem-solving. But even with all this proof, the resistance is still there.

This fear of women in power isn’t just about workplaces, it’s everywhere. In relationships, when a woman is assertive, she’s seen as “too much” or “intimidating.” But when a man does the same thing, he’s confident and ambitious. In politics, women leaders face scrutiny over things that have nothing to do with their work, how they look, what they wear, how they speak. Meanwhile, men in power can make disastrous decisions and still be respected. It’s a double standard that’s been around forever, and honestly, it’s exhausting.

Yeah, I know I’m kind of biased when it comes to supporting women in leadership roles, but like I said, this is my view, so let me be. But beyond that, I don’t just want to talk about women, I also think men get trapped in these expectations too. Toxic masculinity plays a huge role in this. Some men feel just as threatened by other men because society has drilled into them that they always have to be the leader, the aggressive one, the dominant one. And if they’re not? Then suddenly, they’re “not a real man.” What does that even mean? Everyone has both masculine and feminine energy. It’s just energy, just traits.

Women stepping into leadership doesn’t mean men lose power, it just means the world becomes more balanced. It means we acknowledge that competence isn’t based on gender but on skill, intelligence, and ability. It means breaking free from outdated beliefs that hold everyone back. When we recognize that leadership is about capability, not identity, we create a world where everyone has the freedom to thrive without limitation or bias.

The world would be a much better place if we stopped trying to control who gets to lead and just focused on empowering everyone to be the best versions of themselves. When we embrace diversity in leadership, not only do we break down the walls that separate us, but we also unlock our collective potential. A world where every individual is free to lead in their own way is a world that thrives, where creativity, innovation, and growth are limitless.

At the end of the day, we are all individuals. Unique in our own way. Our experiences, our personalities, our ambitions, they all contribute to the tapestry of who we are. So why don’t we just live our lives the way we want, without fear or guilt, and let that be enough? We shouldn’t feel the need to conform to someone else’s expectations of who we should be or what we should achieve.